(Quick catch up -- Gomez decided, for a couple of reasons, that he wanted to spend some time with his dad this summer. I understood completely and didn't raise a fuss, all the while trying desperately not to panic.)

Anyway, before we even got out of the parking lot, hell in fact before I even got the car out of park and into reverse the boys were at it. It was amazing. I haven't seen Gomez in three weeks other than on the weekends when I've been taking Kimo and picking him up. So of course Gomez is just rattling away to me about things. Kimo, on the other hand, felt this overwhelming need to have my attention right then and there. I dunno about other Moms but I can only listen to one at a time. I finally got them lined out, making them take turns in telling me the stories.

Then we get home and it's constant picking and harping at each other. Gomez asked if he could go see his buddy Chase who he hasn't seen or talked to in three weeks so I said "Sure." Then I got asked if Gomez could spend the night at Chases.

~silence~

"Oh, um, well yeah I guess." all the while I'm thinking "You just got home! Spend some time here with me!" But nope, I held it in, forced a smile and drove him over there. Then about 8:30 he called and asked me to come get him. Seems he had a change of heart. ~beams~

The night went great, with the three of us alternately watching Bad Blood together, or occasionally with one of the boys coming into my room to use the computer to surf for something. All in all it was nice.

Today -- today was a whole other matter. Today the shit hit the fan. The boys were in Gomez's room playing on the play station and I snuck online to check email and read some diaries. They hadn't been in there 15 minutes and I hear yelling and screaming and crying. I get Kimo out of there and ask him what happened and the stuff he's telling me doesn't make sense. It was all stuff that happened in the past. Gomez follows Kimo out and totally breaks down into tears (He cries when he's pissed) and declares, and I quote, "I want to go home!"

Ouch

Of course, he probably said it cuz he was so upset because he quickly revised it to be "I want to go back to Dad's."

I got them both calmed down and ended up taking Gomez back to X's parents so that X can come get him tomorrow after work.

I'm meeting myself coming and going whenever I have to two of them. Each, on his own, is always good as gold, but put the two of them together and they are at each other's throats.

I've had people say "That's just what brothers do." or "It's the age difference, it'll stop when Kimo gets older" and things like that but yanno, that doesn't help me now. Logically I know that both are going to have to undergo some personality changes. Kimo is going to have to stop being such a little butthead to his brother and Gomez is going to have to learn how to suck it up and deal with it instead of running away to their Dad's. I mean, hell, I had a bratty little brother and I didn't have the luxury of having three other houses to retreat to. My Dad, who Gomez idolizes, told him flat out "suck it up and deal with it, son". lol

I just don't know. Am I making things worse by letting Gomez run off to his Dad's instead of dealing with Kimo? I honestly thought I was doing us all a favor, yanno? Kind of a break from the day to day bickering that we go through during the school year.

Ummm ... so what happens if Gomez just decides that he wants to live there permanently?

I don't want to think about that. I really don't.

fuck.

bisa

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